Artist Statement

I have skills
writing skills, social skills
I have achievements
I am computer literate
I think I am the person you are looking for
I know Mac, IBM
I am sweet and tolerant
I like to work with people and without people
I can handle the most difficult customers
I know some carpentry
I anticipated that you might be in the need of someone
With my unusual blend of qualifications
I am incredibly qualified
I am very enthusiastic
I eat whatever you give me
I show initiative
I can speak concisely yet with sufficient detail
I have a good appearance, good presence
I can smile, I love smiling, I could smile all day
I am positive
I am positive you will find the time you spend analyzing my capabilities well worth your time
I like this environment
I am healthy, happy, charming
I love your country, my family, your company
I love you
It would be my pleasure to offer you additional details regarding my qualifications during an interview
At your earliest convenience
I am available immediately
I have referrals ambitions
I am clean, responsible, neat and sweet
Not only am I healthy, but I also look very healthy
You should see me in an interview
My public speaking is amazing
I can work under pressure, even harassment
I can work hungry, tired, over time, over you
I am deeply satisfied to live in America
I would be happy here
I am happy already thinking of how happy I would be to work here
This place is great; I match with the walls
I have hobbies, little hobbies that will keep me happy when I am not at work
I'll be whatever you want me to be: Train me - Guide me
Your success is my success
I have a corporate soul
I like this team feeling
I can easily be pressured into conformity and obedience
I can pass as nobody
I can accept very graciously being excluded from opportunities, culture, public debate and power

- So you give jobs? That's very nice of you. You'll give me the possibility to work for the minimum legally possible pay. I am healthy now, but I would get psychosomatic diseases here. I forgot to mention in my resume, I like to go to people's houses and steal their CDs.